Friday, November 19, 2010

My first Entry

Journaling at one time was a huge part of my life.  As a little girl we called it our diary.  Dear Diary... today the cutest boy smiled at me.  Oh for the days of that simple life.  In high school a very dear English teacher had us journal as an ongoing project.  She encouraged us to pour ourselves into this project.  If I remember correctly, most of the girls put much more effort into the project than the boys.  We had a required number of entries and that is usually what our fellow male students would complete.  I can remember writing nightly in that notebook, adding sketches, and random thoughts, and pictures.  That notebook documented my junior year.  My family moved away from that summer, but I continued to write in a journal throughout most of my college years.  Some of my entries, as I look back now, show the young inexperienced soul that I was.  Weeping over boys, or the lack there of.  At some point, my entries became sparse, and eventually stopped.  I do regret not keeping up with my daily musings.  When I do look back over what I had, I am often reminded of that girl who had so much hope.  I am sometimes surprised at how old my soul was at the age of 16.  I am always surprised at how deeply I loved. What did I know back then?  I don't know if it was adulthood that got in the way of my writing, or maybe motherhood, but I often wonder about those years.  Where was my heart, my mind, my emotions?  I do not want to look back five to twenty years from now and wonder the same thing about this era in my life.  Thus, the beginning of my blog.  I will do my best to pour into my writings here as I once did as a young teen.  I am still that girl, just a little older, wiser, maybe a little bruised, but I am still her.  I still love deeply, weep over boys, hope for my children (who now exist), and remain as true to my old soul but young spirit as I possibly can.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Carla! I'm so happy to see you blogging! Now we can be "blog friends" too! LOL I look forward to getting to know you better through your blog dear friend! Have a beautiful weekend!